Apoca-list: the Best (and Worst) Films About the End of the World

The Apocalypse, Armageddon, the rapture, the end of the world, Michael Bay's wet dream. Whatever you call it, as long as there has been entertainment, there have been stories about the world ending. Film is no different. Some of these have been the benchmark of film making, some have been, well, the very opposite. So, when the Renaissance Man asked me to compile a list of my favorites, I knew I had to do it. I only had one rule: No alien invasions. That is a list all it's own, and I look forward to doing that one as well. Here are ten films about the end of the world I have absolutely loved, and five that made me wish they were actual prophecies.

The Best:

10. CHILDREN OF MEN (2006)

The year is 2027, humans can no longer produce offspring, and the youngest person is 18 years of age. Alfonso Cuaron had made a couple of good films before 2006, but it wasn't until this post-apocalyptic thriller that you saw just what he was capable of. The long, patient camera work. The tense moments of pure silence. Of course, hiring Director of Photography Emmanuel Lubezki was a huge credit to this film. Clive Owen's subdued performance as the outsider charged with protecting the only pregnant woman alive is one of many that make this film a cut above so many.

9. THE TERMINATOR (1984)

It's the classic tale of man vs. machine. Except this time the machines have sent one of their own back in time to kill the leader of the resistance before he can be born. I'm sure I didn't actually have to recap the plot of this film for anyone, because, after four films, over half-a-billion in box office grossing, and a canceled TV series, I'm sure most everyone knows it. This was also the series that helped make the future Govenator a house hold name (good or bad as that may be).

8. A BOY AND HIS DOG (1975)

Don Johnson stars in this bizarre piece about a young man roaming a barren wasteland, densely populated with women, with his dog, whom he talks to telepathically. The two begin protecting a woman they come across, and she leads them into an underground society who try to use Johnson for reproducing. I know this sounds silly, but it works in the weirdest way possible. It isn't well shot at all, but something has to be said for a script that seems to be the set up for one single pun.

                                          I promise the film is only slightly as weird as this trailer.

7. SUNSHINE (2007)

The sun is about to burn out, and as a last ditch effort, a team of astronauts and scientists are sent out to re-ignite it. The plot is not the first of its kind, but the solid performances and crisp writing of Alex Garland made it feel fresh. Danny Boyle directs this sci-fi thriller with grace and style. This film seemed to slip past the eye of the public, but like most of Boyle's films, this is not one you should miss.

 6. THE MATRIX (1999)

This is one of the few films on this list I was lucky enough, or old enough, to see in the theatre. I remember watching it wide-eyed, and almost holding my breath. This was also one of the few times I had seen a movie in which I thought to myself, “This is going change everything.” And it did. Though the sequels didn't quite live up, "The Matrix" will live on as the film that ushered in a new era of film making for better or worse. Special effects have continued to push the limits in many films since. Many of those didn't suck. Others, well, you'll see

  5. MAD MAX/THE ROAD WARRIOR (1979/1981)

Not only a couple of my favorite post-apocalyptic films, but some of the finest action movies ever created. So good I couldn't decide which of the two to choose, so I chose them both. George Miller uses the Austrailian Outback as the backdrop of an almost lawless land to grand aplomb. This is a story of a man driven to madness by the murders of his family and best friend, and forced to fight for his survival. It always make me happy to see such ambitious films done on such low budgets. Mel Gibson rode these films to stardom in the US, which is impressive considering he only had 16 lines in the second one.

4. THE PLANET OF THE APES SERIES (1968 - 2011)

I realize the last two entries are eight films combined, but this is my blog, so deal with it. I think every film in this series is fantastic (I'm not including the Burton remake, but I am including the new reboot). Apes have evolved, overthrown mankind, and are doing to us exactly what we do to them: exploit and experiment on. At first it would seem that it was a space travel piece, but the big reveal at the end of the first film, ruined by years of parody, shows exactly what has transpired.

3. TWELVE MONKEYS (1995)

Based on the film "La Jetee", Terry Gilliam directs a film about a prisoner sent back in time to stop an army of militants from poisoning the Earth, and causing it to be uninhabitable for mankind. This film especially makes it to this spot for two reason above the many others: 1. Brad Pitt's purely psychotic performance was something of a breakout for him. 2. Bruce Willis, as a child, watches himself die without knowing it. This is Terry Gilliam at his absolute best. I'm talking “Brazil” good.

                                      This got Brad Pitt an Oscar nomination. No, I'm not kidding.

2. NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD/DAWN OF THE DEAD (1968/1978)

The term “zombie apocalypse” is thrown around so much these days. So much that CDC has released a Zombie Survival Guide. But, the films that started the craze, and still remain the best of the genre, are George A. Romero's “Dead” series. “Night” used its zombies as a statement on the Red Scare, while “Dawn” beautifully railed against American consumerism. Tom Savini's make-up effects on “Dawn” pushed on-screen violence to the limits, and are still some of the most gut-wrenching I've ever seen.

                                                             VIEWER DISCRETION

 1. WALL-E (2008)

This is possibly the most upbeat film about the end of civilization on Earth. Pixar managed to capture the absolute loneliness of a single robot left to clean up the entire landscape of garbage left by man, and one of the most incredible love stories of our generation, with hardly a word spoken. When we are finally introduce to the human characters in the piece, they are revealed to be massive blobs that do nothing for themselves. This may seem bleak on paper, but “WALL-E” manages to bring one thing to the genre that few films ever have: Hope.

                                                                          The future...

The Worst:

 5. AVATAR (2009)

James Cameron wrote and directed a remake of “Dances with Wolves” several years in the future when man has struck out from the Earth they've killed in order to kill a paradise. The dialogue is corny, the performances are horrible, and the villain is such a cartoon that it is hard to take this SFX heavy film seriously. For the 500 Million dollars, you would think Cameron could have bought a better script.

4. WATERWORLD (1995)

Speaking of overblown budgets, and “Dances with Wolves”! Kevin Costner co-directed this film about an Earth underwater, and controlled by outlaws, that went far over budget, lost it's director halfway through filming, and was nominated for four Razzies. I think this was best summed up by Dana Carvey, playing Ross Perot, “You can't pee into a Mr. Coffee, and ask for Taster's Choice.”

3. THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW/2012 (2004/2009)

Oh, Roland Emmerich. I was going to put these silly tales of Earth's mass destruction separately on the list, until I found out they're practically the exact same movie. Massive disasters happening all over the world, bad writing, worse special effects, and great actors collecting paychecks to say the worst dialogue Emmerich could possibly write.

2. MELANCHOLIA

Stupid dialogue, two-dimensional characters, wood performances, and bad camera work are all present in a film that has nothing positive to offer, and is too damn long to be as boring as it is. Lars Von Trier proves that you don't need a huge budget, and the approval of the Hollywood machine, to make a terrible film.

1. ARMAGEDDON

Michael Bay proves that it doesn't hurt. Everytime.