 |
| What a wonderful "World" |
Grade: A-
3D: N/A
Easter Egg: No...
Starring: Lake Bell, Fred Malamed, Rob Corddry
Director: Lake Bell
Writer(s): Lake Bell
RT: 93 min
Rating: R for language including some sexual references
Sunday, January 26, 2014
In A World... (2013)
Grade: A-
3D: N/A
Easter Egg: No...
Starring: Lake Bell, Fred Malamed, Rob Corddry
Director: Lake Bell
Writer(s): Lake Bell
RT: 93 min
Rating: R for language including some sexual references
Saturday, January 25, 2014
I, Frankenstein (2014)
 |
| Being "Frank" |
Grade: D
3D: Definitely not worth it.
Easter Egg: Shockingly, no.
Starring: Aaron Eckhart, Bill Nighy, Miranda Otto
Director: Stuart Beattie
Writer(s): Stuart Beattie - Story: Beattie and Kevin Grevioux (also Comic)
RT: 93 min
Rating: PG-13 for sequences of intense fantasy action and violence throughout
Thursday, January 23, 2014
2013: My 20 Most Hated Films
It is difficult every year to sit through some of the things I make myself sit through, but I do it because I enjoy writing about film, and why I like or dislike it. I like deconstructing good cinema and bad cinema alike, and discovering what works. This year I felt was a much better year for movies than many of the recent past, but that doesn't mean we escaped the usual garbage that permeates every year.
20. The Heat (66%)
I hate that my worst list is usually filled with bad comedies. Comedies I have to continuously hear how funny they are. Director Paul Feig proved that his talent lies within a good script, much like Kristen Wiig and Annie Mumolo's Oscar-nominated "Bridesmaids" script. He manages to waste almost two hours with the uncharismatic duo of Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy (who has three films on this list). The two stumble through improved scenes and ridiculous situations until an opaque ending falls into your lap that you can't possibly care about. What could have easily been an interesting female take on "Lethal Weapon", gave way to tired slapstick and jokes about spanx.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Melissa McCarthy trying to recapture her thunder from "Bridesmaids" was a little sad.
19. 21 and Over (28%)
I can't even think of of words that explain exactly how bad this film was. So, let me stumble through a couple of sentences like the actors stumbled through this ridiculous plot and bad writing. Jon Lucas and Scott Moore have written and directed a mind-numbing party film about a couple of irresponsible college kids who get their friend far too drunk, and then they lose him. This is the plot to a movie. I promise, you aren't missing anything if you skip this. Trust me.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Two words - Tube socks
18. Stoker (69%)
I was very interested in Chan-wook Park's ("Oldboy") English language debut. His narratives are usually stark and jarring, but "Stoker" fell flat in many ways. Whether it was Nicole Kidman's normal cheesy performance, or Matthew Goode's bland one, there isn't much for Mia Wasikowski to play off of. She is the lone bright spot in a very poorly paced, and clumsily written movie. Instead of feeling shocked at all of the incest and murder that runs throughout the film, I simply felt bored. As if I had seen this all before, but in much better Park projects.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Every time Goode kills someone with a belt, it becomes sillier.
17. Scary MoVie (4%)
How have things gotten this far? Really. Somebody please tell me. Are people really going to see spoofs anymore? Has there even been a good since "Robin Hood: Men in Tights"? This series should have ended after the second installment, which is still my least favorite of the five, and should never have wasted the talents of David Zucker (who also hasn't made a decent film in nearly two decades). The actors speak their lines so quickly in this movie, it almost feels as if they'e trying to race to the end of it quicker than the audience ran for the exits.
Most Embarrassing Moment: The entire opening sequence with Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan.
16. Grown Ups 2 (7%)
Do you know those times when you're sitting around with a group of friends, making jokes that only you would find funny, and then, for some reason, you try to tell some of these jokes to a third party, only to find them fall flat? That is the very essence of "Grown Ups 2". A group of aging sketch comedy actors doing sketches that make them laugh, and trying to make them fit into a movie. Almost none of the scenes flow together, and none of them are funny. There is also a lot of wasted talent in this film, most comes from a series of cameos including Steve Buscemi and Shaquille O'Neal (easily the best part of the film).
Most Embarrassing Moment: 80's nostalgia usually takes me out of a film, and there was an entire 80's party.
15. We're the Millers (47%)
Is it telling that when I went to find a picture of this film, that most of the results were of Jennifer Aniston's strip scene? This movie was so bad, that the only thing interesting about it was her breasts. This movie is awful from the premise up. A man gets in trouble with a drug dealer, and has to become a mule to save himself. Thus he hires a fake family to help him cross the border, and a bunch of stupid things happen (like a fake baby made of weed getting run over by a car). The jokes aren't funny and the acting is mediocre. There really isn't much about this film that is at all redeemable.
Most Embarrassing Moment: The film opens with the "Double Rainbow" YouTube video.
14. I Give It a Year (55%)
I'm sure writer and director, Dan Mazer, meant well when wrote this comedy, but instead he wrote a mean-spirited farce about marriage. There were no laughs in this horrible comedy, and list of very bad performances from people I like, and a few I really don't. Every awkward situation in this movie is as groan worthy as the next, and every line is like listening people speaking in tongues. The title alone, which is actually a line of dialogue in the film, should be enough to tell you exactly how bad this film is.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Stephen Merchant's best man speech is neither funny or interesting.
13. The Lone Ranger (31%)
I wish Disney would have just called this "Pirates of the Carribean 5: The Western Years", because there really is no differentiating between this swill, and that swill. Over blown special effects, stupid action sequences, and scenery chewing performances all help to make this a drag of a movie. They turn the title character into a whiny, stupid sidekick, and manage to drain any respect from the franchise. Not to mention, when they got around to finally using the Lone Ranger's signature line, they spoof it, and throw it away as if it was a joke to begin with.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Every time Johnny Depp talks.
12. The Starving Games (0%)
Another spoof from spoof masters, and by masters I mean guys who keep getting film deals somehow, Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer ("Date Movie", "Epic Movie", "Disaster Movie"). This time they have set their sights on "The Hunger Games", and they managed to fill it with cheap throw-away jokes, and empty pop culture references that fly by so quickly that you barely have time to process them by the time next one goes buzzing past your ears.
Most Embarrassing Moment:
11. The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones (12%)
Here is an example of Hollywood trying to cash in on the "Twilight" young adult fiction craze, and actually making a film that is somehow worse than the "Twilight" series. Everything about this film was incredibly uninteresting, and every performance is sub-par at best, even the usually exciting Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Direct Harwald Zwart gluts the screen with cheap special effects, clumsy action sequences, and corny dialogue that continuously pours from the mouths of the actors curdled milk. I'm not really sure how this missed the top ten.
Most Embarrassing Moment: That blonde guy in the picture? He was a pretty bad find...
10. A Resurrection (N/A)
20. The Heat (66%)
I hate that my worst list is usually filled with bad comedies. Comedies I have to continuously hear how funny they are. Director Paul Feig proved that his talent lies within a good script, much like Kristen Wiig and Annie Mumolo's Oscar-nominated "Bridesmaids" script. He manages to waste almost two hours with the uncharismatic duo of Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy (who has three films on this list). The two stumble through improved scenes and ridiculous situations until an opaque ending falls into your lap that you can't possibly care about. What could have easily been an interesting female take on "Lethal Weapon", gave way to tired slapstick and jokes about spanx.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Melissa McCarthy trying to recapture her thunder from "Bridesmaids" was a little sad.
19. 21 and Over (28%)
I can't even think of of words that explain exactly how bad this film was. So, let me stumble through a couple of sentences like the actors stumbled through this ridiculous plot and bad writing. Jon Lucas and Scott Moore have written and directed a mind-numbing party film about a couple of irresponsible college kids who get their friend far too drunk, and then they lose him. This is the plot to a movie. I promise, you aren't missing anything if you skip this. Trust me.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Two words - Tube socks
18. Stoker (69%)
I was very interested in Chan-wook Park's ("Oldboy") English language debut. His narratives are usually stark and jarring, but "Stoker" fell flat in many ways. Whether it was Nicole Kidman's normal cheesy performance, or Matthew Goode's bland one, there isn't much for Mia Wasikowski to play off of. She is the lone bright spot in a very poorly paced, and clumsily written movie. Instead of feeling shocked at all of the incest and murder that runs throughout the film, I simply felt bored. As if I had seen this all before, but in much better Park projects.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Every time Goode kills someone with a belt, it becomes sillier.
17. Scary MoVie (4%)
How have things gotten this far? Really. Somebody please tell me. Are people really going to see spoofs anymore? Has there even been a good since "Robin Hood: Men in Tights"? This series should have ended after the second installment, which is still my least favorite of the five, and should never have wasted the talents of David Zucker (who also hasn't made a decent film in nearly two decades). The actors speak their lines so quickly in this movie, it almost feels as if they'e trying to race to the end of it quicker than the audience ran for the exits.
Most Embarrassing Moment: The entire opening sequence with Charlie Sheen and Lindsay Lohan.
16. Grown Ups 2 (7%)
Do you know those times when you're sitting around with a group of friends, making jokes that only you would find funny, and then, for some reason, you try to tell some of these jokes to a third party, only to find them fall flat? That is the very essence of "Grown Ups 2". A group of aging sketch comedy actors doing sketches that make them laugh, and trying to make them fit into a movie. Almost none of the scenes flow together, and none of them are funny. There is also a lot of wasted talent in this film, most comes from a series of cameos including Steve Buscemi and Shaquille O'Neal (easily the best part of the film).
Most Embarrassing Moment: 80's nostalgia usually takes me out of a film, and there was an entire 80's party.
15. We're the Millers (47%)
Is it telling that when I went to find a picture of this film, that most of the results were of Jennifer Aniston's strip scene? This movie was so bad, that the only thing interesting about it was her breasts. This movie is awful from the premise up. A man gets in trouble with a drug dealer, and has to become a mule to save himself. Thus he hires a fake family to help him cross the border, and a bunch of stupid things happen (like a fake baby made of weed getting run over by a car). The jokes aren't funny and the acting is mediocre. There really isn't much about this film that is at all redeemable.
Most Embarrassing Moment: The film opens with the "Double Rainbow" YouTube video.
14. I Give It a Year (55%)
I'm sure writer and director, Dan Mazer, meant well when wrote this comedy, but instead he wrote a mean-spirited farce about marriage. There were no laughs in this horrible comedy, and list of very bad performances from people I like, and a few I really don't. Every awkward situation in this movie is as groan worthy as the next, and every line is like listening people speaking in tongues. The title alone, which is actually a line of dialogue in the film, should be enough to tell you exactly how bad this film is.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Stephen Merchant's best man speech is neither funny or interesting.
13. The Lone Ranger (31%)
I wish Disney would have just called this "Pirates of the Carribean 5: The Western Years", because there really is no differentiating between this swill, and that swill. Over blown special effects, stupid action sequences, and scenery chewing performances all help to make this a drag of a movie. They turn the title character into a whiny, stupid sidekick, and manage to drain any respect from the franchise. Not to mention, when they got around to finally using the Lone Ranger's signature line, they spoof it, and throw it away as if it was a joke to begin with.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Every time Johnny Depp talks.
12. The Starving Games (0%)
Another spoof from spoof masters, and by masters I mean guys who keep getting film deals somehow, Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer ("Date Movie", "Epic Movie", "Disaster Movie"). This time they have set their sights on "The Hunger Games", and they managed to fill it with cheap throw-away jokes, and empty pop culture references that fly by so quickly that you barely have time to process them by the time next one goes buzzing past your ears.
Most Embarrassing Moment:
11. The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones (12%)
Here is an example of Hollywood trying to cash in on the "Twilight" young adult fiction craze, and actually making a film that is somehow worse than the "Twilight" series. Everything about this film was incredibly uninteresting, and every performance is sub-par at best, even the usually exciting Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Direct Harwald Zwart gluts the screen with cheap special effects, clumsy action sequences, and corny dialogue that continuously pours from the mouths of the actors curdled milk. I'm not really sure how this missed the top ten.
Most Embarrassing Moment: That blonde guy in the picture? He was a pretty bad find...
10. A Resurrection (N/A)
I'm surprised this is the first horror movie to hit my list this year. I genuinely love bad horror movies, but this was pretty hard to stomach. A young boy is murdered, and his soul comes back to claim the lives of those who were responsible. The acting was horrid, despite the presence of Devon Sawa, as every actor seemed to mumble their ways through their lines. I don't even know what was up with this grimy looking cinematography. Every scene looks like they forgot to clean off the lens before they called action. I think writer/director Matt Orlando needs to get to back to film school.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Misha Barton plays a guidance counselor.
9. Aftershock (35%)
There are bad disaster films, the kind with the name Roland Emmerich stapled to them, and then there is "Aftershock". This is one part disaster flick, one part true story (based on the 2010 8.8 Chilean earthquake), and part horror film. That's right. It follows around a group of tourists being lead around Chile by a semi-famous local (named Pollo) who is giving them party tour of the Central Coast. They end up in a club when the earthquake hits, and then all hell breaks loose. Or at least the prisoners do. They violence is unnecessary and gratuitous, while the acting even more horrific than the things happening on screen. I should have known that with Eli Roth's involvement, this would not turn out to be as good as "The Tower".
Most Embarrassing Moment: A character loses his hand, and the frightened patrons of the night club kick it around a dance floor. Laughs ensue.
8. The Hangover Part III (19%)
There were so many bad sequels this year, but none were as bad as the absolutely played out joke that was "The Hangover III". Every movie in this series was bad, and each got worse than the last, until this steaming garbage pile was dropped in our laps. Zach Galifianakis continues to annoy as the semi-retarded Alan, and Bradley Cooper proves that he isn't that great of an actor without the help of better directors like David O. Russell. Unfortunately, this time Todd Phillips managed to drag John Goodman down with the sinking ship, which may have been the most disappointing part of the whole ordeal.
Most Embarrassing Moment: I want to say the whole scene where Alan murders a giraffe, but there is so many bad moments.
7. Pain & Gain (49%)
Oh, Michael Bay. This is my third year doing this list, and you have managed to make two of them. This time you mangled a true story about a crew of Miami body builders who kidnapped, tortured, and murdered people in the late 90's by turning it into a comedy. A really unfunny comedy. Bay treats these meatheads with more respect than he has ever treated any characters in his entire filmography, and treads lightly through all of their awful plans and executions. The talents of Mark Wahlberg, Dwayne Johnson, and Anthony Mackie are all wasted in this waste of time and space to the point that I almost wondered if I would ever enjoy them in any movie ever again. Fortunately, I did: Wahlberg in "Lone Survivor", Johnson in "Fast & Furious 28" (or whatever number they are on), and Mackie in the "Captain America: The Winter Soldier" trailer.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Comparing the movie to the real events, and Michael Bay directed it.
6. Breaking the Girls (11%)
This movie wanted to be "Wild Things" so bad, that it forgot what made that movie interesting wasn't just the intricate sex scenes. And sex scenes were all this film had to offer, and even those weren't any good. The dialogue in Jamie Babbit's non-thrilling thriller is clunky at best, and the acting is all second rate. Every "twist" feels less like a revelation, and more an obvious turn that the characters should have known about all along.
The Most Embarrassing Moment: All of the gratuitous lesbian make out scenes.
5. The Lost Medallion: The Adventures of Billy Stone (0%)
Writer/Director Billy Muir seems like he rushed through film as fast as he could, for reasons I don't understand. His actors are all flat and unimpressive, his script is poorly paced and makes little sense, and his camera work is really rough. Not to mention, he tries to end the film with a faith-based conclusion that undermines everything that just happened. This is supposed to be a children's version of "Raiders of the Lost Ark", but comes off as a muddled mess with slapstick action scenes and little actual direction.
4. A Haunted House (10%)
Yes, this is the third spoof on the list, and boy was this one a doozy. There was once a time when the Wayans Brothers were actually funny, but that time seems to have passed. It probably passed sometime around "Scary Movie 2" or "White Chicks". Here is another example of thinking padding your film with nothing but sex jokes is what comedy is all about, and telling twenty jokes a minute constitutes timing. Every performance is like forks scraping a plate, but much, much more annoying, and and the writing never finds its footing outside of a bunch of lame sex jokes. Seriously, there are a lot of sex jokes.
Most Embarrassing Moment: The first big joke of the film was killing a dog.
3. Crystal Fairy and the Magical Cactus (82%)
This indie road-trip drug comedy was Michael Cera at his most irritating, and that is saying something, because there have been times when he pushes the boundaries of irritating to their limits. The plot revolves around a group of friends who want to try a recipe involving a hallucinogenic cactus grown in Chile. Along the way they pick up a young hippie named Crystal Fairy who finds herself constantly at odds with Cera. The writing isn't worth the paper it is written on, and the actors all seem very uninterested. Nothing works, and I wound up falling asleep during my first attempt at watching it.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Michael Cera's impatient attitude made me impatient for the end.
2. InAPPropriate Comedy (0%)
Sketch comedy is best left to people who know what they are doing, and not just doing it to get a rise out of people. Being offensive can be funny, but, unfortunately, this crew knows nothing about that. Every scene was as groan worthy as the last, and they kept repeating the worst sketches over and over again. Not only was this bad enough, but they dragged Adrien Brody, an actor I'm quite fond of, into the film, and made him do sketches so bad that I started thinking they should take his Oscar back. And speaking of taking awards away from people...
Most Embarrassing Moment: The "Flirty Harry" or "Amazing Racist" sketches were all pretty bad, but then, so was the whole movie.
1. Movie 43 (4%)
...I wrote this review back in January, and I stick by it! I think that is all I really need to say, because the less you know about this film, the fuller your life will be.
Most Embarrassing Moment: Hugh Jackman's neck-scrotum... I can't believe I just typed that...
Saturday, January 18, 2014
25 Films #1
I figured with every 25 films I watch, I would compile them in a post. If I did a Facebook review I copy/paste it, if I did a blog review I will simply post a link. So... here are the first 25.
#1: 47 Ronin
#2: The Wolf of Wall Street
#3: Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs 2 (2013)
It has half of laughs of the original, but still plenty of spirit. I did enjoy the voice work, and the foodimals were a lot of fun.
Grade: C
#4: The Best Offer (2014)
An interesting drama with a good performance by Geoffrey Rush. The run time is a little longer than it needs to be for the story, but the ending actually saves it from falling into bad movie territory.
Grade: B-
#5: Open Grave (2014)
A middle-of-the-road thriller starring Sharlto Copely, that doesn't manage to do anything with its interesting premise. The third act is such a dud, that it squanders all of the intrigue it built up.
Grade: C-
#6: The Adventurer: The Curse of the Midas Box (2014)
Despite a lackluster story, and some cut rate cinematography, the majority of this film happens to be a lot of fun. Hammy performances from Michael Sheen and Sam Neill, relishing in their roles, are definitely the brightest spots.
Grade: C+
#7: Enough Said (2013)
Julia Louis-Dreyfus and James Gandolfini (in his final role) make the most believable, and adorable, couple on screen this year as a pair of divorcees. This is not only the best romantic comedy I have seen in a long while, but just one of the best screen romances. Some of the motions are predictable, but still manage to pull off some good laughs.
Grade: A
#8: Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones
#9: Grudge Match (2013)
A couple of good performances (especially from Kevin Hart), and a handful of good laughs, keep this dud from being complete garbage. De Niro and Stallone do nothing but embarrass themselves in what is essentially a sentimental commercial for anybody who was willing to advertise in it.
Grade: D+
#10: Space Jam (1996) *Rewatched
I haven't seen this film since its release 18 years ago, and I was pleased to discover that it actually stood up pretty well. Despite some bad acting from the basketball stars, and some less than quality cinematography, the movie is a lot of fun, and filled of some good laughs.
Grade: B
#11: Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom (2013)
Honestly, as much as I wanted to like it, this movie was a little boring. Idris Elba plays Mandela with a great respect and depth, a depth which the story never seems to accomplish. Naomie Harris is equally as good in the, and much better than Jennifer Hudson, as the under-utilized Winnie Mandela
Grade: C
#12: August: Osage County (2013)
A group of strong performances (Julia Roberts and Margo Martindale among my favorites) , and some fine direction give this movie a strong core. Tracy Letts does his best to polish his own play's script for a film setting, but falls a little short in scenes that should pack a little more punch
Grade: B+
#13: The Legend of Hercules
#14: Her (2013) - A-
#15: Nebraska (2013) - A
#16: Inside Llewyn Davis (2013) - A
Short reviews for these three can be found in this article.
#17: Lone Survivor (2013)
This is a brutal and gut wrenching look at the bonds of brotherhood and the perseverance of will. With strong performances from the four leads, wonderful make-up effects from Greg Nicotero (Walking Dead), and Tobias Schliessler's beautiful in-the-moment cinematography, this is possibly Peter Berg's finest film to date. At least it makes up for the embarrassment that was "Battleship"
Grade: B+
#18: Short Term 12 (2013)
This film will break your heart in so many ways, and you will love it for that. Brie Larson is a complete revelation in this role, and it is going to be an absolute shame to watch this get passed over at every major award ceremony this year, because this movie (and Larson) deserves any accolade that they aren't going to give it (and her). See this now!
Grade: A+
#19: Rush (2013)
Great directing, cinematography, and a stunning performance by Daniel Bruhl, as Niki Lauda, make up for a decent script and a few lackluster performances. Chris Hemsworth was pretty good too. This is a good film, but hardly a great one.
Grade: B
#20: Hell Baby (2013)
It is always a shame to see a bunch of people who are REALLY funny, do something that is very much the opposite. This was a laughless comedy that was more along the lines of the "Scary Movie" franchise than "The State", which its stars, writers and directors (Robert Ben Garant and Thomas Lennon) originated from.
Grade: D-
#21: Thanks For Sharing (2013)
At times it is a tad melodramatic, Stuart Blumberg's film is a interesting look at addiction, and the power it holds over every day life. The seven main characters all hand in strong performances, including Alecia Moore (pop star Pink) in her acting debut.
Grade: B+
#22: The Croods (2013)
A fun family film with a lot of heart, and a lot of good laughs. Clever voice acting (even Nic Cage), stunning visuals, and a funny script make for a mostly solid 90 minutes of entertainment.
Grade: B
#23: Prisoners (2013)
As an expectant father, this is suddenly the scariest film I have ever seen. Hugh Jackman gives a stunning performance as a father who's daughter has been kidnapped, and decides to go all "Liam Neeson" on Paul Dano. Seriously, this is a great movie.
Grade: A-
#24: Big Ass Spider (2013)
It should seem fairly certain by the title of this movie what it is about, and boy is it a lot of fun. The plot is as cheesy as it needs to be, and the acting is over-the-top at times, to great effect. The special effects are low budget enough to try to make the film better, which made me very happy. If you enjoy films like "Sharknado", then this should be right up your alley.
Grade: C
#25: Devil's Due (2014)
A very silly, very boring, completely scareless "found footage" horror film. I would steer clear of this awful movie entirely if I were you.
Grade: F
#1: 47 Ronin
#2: The Wolf of Wall Street
#3: Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs 2 (2013)
It has half of laughs of the original, but still plenty of spirit. I did enjoy the voice work, and the foodimals were a lot of fun.
Grade: C
#4: The Best Offer (2014)
An interesting drama with a good performance by Geoffrey Rush. The run time is a little longer than it needs to be for the story, but the ending actually saves it from falling into bad movie territory.
Grade: B-
#5: Open Grave (2014)
A middle-of-the-road thriller starring Sharlto Copely, that doesn't manage to do anything with its interesting premise. The third act is such a dud, that it squanders all of the intrigue it built up.
Grade: C-
#6: The Adventurer: The Curse of the Midas Box (2014)
Despite a lackluster story, and some cut rate cinematography, the majority of this film happens to be a lot of fun. Hammy performances from Michael Sheen and Sam Neill, relishing in their roles, are definitely the brightest spots.
Grade: C+
#7: Enough Said (2013)
Julia Louis-Dreyfus and James Gandolfini (in his final role) make the most believable, and adorable, couple on screen this year as a pair of divorcees. This is not only the best romantic comedy I have seen in a long while, but just one of the best screen romances. Some of the motions are predictable, but still manage to pull off some good laughs.
Grade: A
#8: Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones
#9: Grudge Match (2013)
A couple of good performances (especially from Kevin Hart), and a handful of good laughs, keep this dud from being complete garbage. De Niro and Stallone do nothing but embarrass themselves in what is essentially a sentimental commercial for anybody who was willing to advertise in it.
Grade: D+
#10: Space Jam (1996) *Rewatched
I haven't seen this film since its release 18 years ago, and I was pleased to discover that it actually stood up pretty well. Despite some bad acting from the basketball stars, and some less than quality cinematography, the movie is a lot of fun, and filled of some good laughs.
Grade: B
#11: Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom (2013)
Honestly, as much as I wanted to like it, this movie was a little boring. Idris Elba plays Mandela with a great respect and depth, a depth which the story never seems to accomplish. Naomie Harris is equally as good in the, and much better than Jennifer Hudson, as the under-utilized Winnie Mandela
Grade: C
#12: August: Osage County (2013)
A group of strong performances (Julia Roberts and Margo Martindale among my favorites) , and some fine direction give this movie a strong core. Tracy Letts does his best to polish his own play's script for a film setting, but falls a little short in scenes that should pack a little more punch
Grade: B+
#13: The Legend of Hercules
#14: Her (2013) - A-
#15: Nebraska (2013) - A
#16: Inside Llewyn Davis (2013) - A
Short reviews for these three can be found in this article.
#17: Lone Survivor (2013)
This is a brutal and gut wrenching look at the bonds of brotherhood and the perseverance of will. With strong performances from the four leads, wonderful make-up effects from Greg Nicotero (Walking Dead), and Tobias Schliessler's beautiful in-the-moment cinematography, this is possibly Peter Berg's finest film to date. At least it makes up for the embarrassment that was "Battleship"
Grade: B+
#18: Short Term 12 (2013)
This film will break your heart in so many ways, and you will love it for that. Brie Larson is a complete revelation in this role, and it is going to be an absolute shame to watch this get passed over at every major award ceremony this year, because this movie (and Larson) deserves any accolade that they aren't going to give it (and her). See this now!
Grade: A+
#19: Rush (2013)
Great directing, cinematography, and a stunning performance by Daniel Bruhl, as Niki Lauda, make up for a decent script and a few lackluster performances. Chris Hemsworth was pretty good too. This is a good film, but hardly a great one.
Grade: B
#20: Hell Baby (2013)
It is always a shame to see a bunch of people who are REALLY funny, do something that is very much the opposite. This was a laughless comedy that was more along the lines of the "Scary Movie" franchise than "The State", which its stars, writers and directors (Robert Ben Garant and Thomas Lennon) originated from.
Grade: D-
#21: Thanks For Sharing (2013)
At times it is a tad melodramatic, Stuart Blumberg's film is a interesting look at addiction, and the power it holds over every day life. The seven main characters all hand in strong performances, including Alecia Moore (pop star Pink) in her acting debut.
Grade: B+
#22: The Croods (2013)
A fun family film with a lot of heart, and a lot of good laughs. Clever voice acting (even Nic Cage), stunning visuals, and a funny script make for a mostly solid 90 minutes of entertainment.
Grade: B
#23: Prisoners (2013)
As an expectant father, this is suddenly the scariest film I have ever seen. Hugh Jackman gives a stunning performance as a father who's daughter has been kidnapped, and decides to go all "Liam Neeson" on Paul Dano. Seriously, this is a great movie.
Grade: A-
#24: Big Ass Spider (2013)
It should seem fairly certain by the title of this movie what it is about, and boy is it a lot of fun. The plot is as cheesy as it needs to be, and the acting is over-the-top at times, to great effect. The special effects are low budget enough to try to make the film better, which made me very happy. If you enjoy films like "Sharknado", then this should be right up your alley.
Grade: C
#25: Devil's Due (2014)
A very silly, very boring, completely scareless "found footage" horror film. I would steer clear of this awful movie entirely if I were you.
Grade: F
Friday, January 17, 2014
Ride Along (2014)
 |
| "Along" Came Kevin |
Grade: D+
3D: N/A
Easter Egg: Mid-credits sequence
Starring: Ice Cube, Kevin Hart, Tika Sumpter
Director: Tim Story
Writer(s): Greg Coolidge (also story) and Jason Mantzoukas and Phil Hay & Matt Manfredi
RT: 100 min
Rating: PG-13 for sequences of violence, sexual content and brief strong language
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
2013: My 20 Favorite Films of the Year
Well, we have reached the end of another great year in film. And this year seemed to be especially exceptional. I saw more films this year that seemed to capture my heart, and attention, than in many previous years. I was actually sad to see some of the films get cut from my top 20, where in the last two years they seemed to be kind of a shrug off. 2013 saw some seasoned film makers making some of the best films of their career, and a few rookies making some of the most impressive debuts I have ever seen. So, please feel free to comment and share. I would love to know what you think, and what some of your favorite films were from the year.
This was such a great year for cinema that I felt I need to share the eleven films that just barely made it onto the list:
30. Gimme the Loot
29. Monsters University
28. Starbuck (remade later this year as "Delivery Man")
27. Ain't Them Bodies Saints
26. The Broken Circle Breakdown
25. The History of Future Folk
24. Philomena
23. Dallas Buyers Club
22. The Book Thief
21. (a) About Time
21. (b) The Tower (I really struggled not putting these two on the list.)
20. Elysium
"District 9" blew me away with its beautiful special effects, and its allegory of South American apartheid. Though "Elysium", Neill Blomkamp's newest offering, didn't explode off of the screen as vividly, it certainly captured my imagination. Matt Damon plays an ex-con-turned-factory-worker who gets radiation poisoning while on the job. However, due to his social status, he does not have access to decent health care, and thus is given 20 days to live. What follows is a taut science fiction thriller about the dangers of the ever widening class separation, and need for more accessible health care for the poor.
The Moment I Fell in Love: MATT DAMON!!!
19. Side Effects
Steven Soderbergh had quite a year this year. Before he released his Emmy-winning "Behind the Candelabra", he released this twisty thriller starring Rooney Mara as woman who kills her husband, while on an experimental prescription medication, and the therapist caught in her web (Jude Law). Soderbergh tends to get the best out of all of his actors, and his cinematography (as "Peter Andrews") is as low key and relaxed as ever. He captures Scott Z. Burns' twisting narrative with such minimal effort, that it is impossible not to find yourself swept up in every minute detail and betrayal. Unfortunately, this came out in February, so there will be no Oscar buzz, but Rooney Mara should be put on the list for Best Actress consideration, because she handles every word without a hitch.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Channing Tatum gets stabbed and killed. What's not to love?
18. Her
There is so much depth, and so much heart, to Spike Jonze's latest film, "Her". It is charming and funny, while introspective and emotional. Joaquin Phoenix plays Theodore, an introvert who is going through a messy divorce, and is having trouble connecting to the outside world (despite his job writing "hand-written" letters to other people). He downloads a sentient new operating system, Samantha (voiced to perfection by Scarlett Johansson), and begins to fall in love with her. Well written, beautifully shot (thank you, Hoyte Van Hoytema), and expertly acted, this look at intimacy in an ever-changing world is the perfect romance film for the modern age.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Theodore and Samantha do a little duet.
17. The Wolf of Wall Street
Martin Scorsese has created the quintessential film about excess. Casting his now decade long partner, Leonardo DiCaprio, as real life stock broker Jordan Belfort, he managed to make a film that is loud, sleek, and packed wall to wall with unbelievable debauchery. It is also a very scathing criticism of the lavish lifestyles of men who are essentially highly paid thieves and swindlers. Terrence Winter's script is funny and shocking, while Rodrigo Prieto's cinematography is smooth and stylish. The cast clicks in all the right ways, and gives a SAG worthy performance. Be warned, however, this movie is NOT for everyone.
Moment I Fell in Love: Belfort, during his first job on Wall Street, goes to lunch with established broker, Mark Hanna (played by Matthew McConaughey).
16. You're Next
It isn't often that horror movies make it in to my top films of the year. Last time might have even been "28 Days Later" in 2003. "You're Next" just happened to have such a basic premise with absolutely stunning execution. Director Simon Wingard does everything in this home-invasion film that James DeMonaco failed to do with "The Purge" earlier in the year. It's tense, frightening, and, at times, really funny. The third act of this film may be some of the most interesting bit of horror cinema I have seen in quite some time. This became one of the least talked about films of the year, and that seemed very undeserved. You should take the time to take in this soon-to-be cult classic.
The Moment I Fell in Love: A twist in the plot leads to some seriously amusing consequences.
15. All is Lost
There is a reason that Robert Redford is movie star. There is a reason that Paul Newman worked with him so often. There is a reason he was cast in a film where his character is the only face you see on screen and barely speaks, and it is one of the most riveting performances you will see all year! Writer/director J.C. Chandor has you spend 106 minutes watching one man fight to save himself after his boat hits a random shipping container floating in the middle of nowhere. Despite the action only revolving around a single person, the story never seems to drag. Every setback is heartbreaking, and every victory almost feels like you should audibly cheering.
The Moment I Feel in Love: It is hard to pinpoint, because I was so immersed in Redford's character (plainly named "Our Man").
14. Frances Ha
Greta Gerwig may be the most utterly charming actress in Hollywood today. For proof, you don't need to look any further than her performance in Noah Baumbach's "Frances Ha". This is the story of young dancer who is a bit of slacker, and more than a little homeless. Baumbach, from a script co-written by Gerwig, creates a stunning homage to French new-wave cinema, and directs possibly the best Woody Allen film to not be made by Woody Allen.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Watching Frances gracefully dance, though she clumsily fumbles through life.
13. Before Midnight
If you ever wanted a more realistic take on how relationships actually work, then look no further. Richard Linklater, Julie Delpy, and Ethan Hawke have given you the third installment to their series that started in 1995, and it is absolutely the best of the three. After spending one night together in Paris, and finding each other ten years later, Celine (Delpy) and Jesse (Hawke) have settled down, and built a life together with their twin girls, and Jesse's son, Hank, who sees them only twice a year, which actually becomes a major point of contention for the two. Much like the previous films, this is a dialogue centered piece about the nature of love, and the hardships of relationships.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Jesse's awkward goodbye to his son is both funny and touching.
12. The Way, Way Back
Oscar-winning film makers Nat Faxon and Jim Rash co-wrote and directed this coming-of-age film about an awkward 14 year old boy on vacation at his mother's boyfriend's summer home. He ends up getting a job at a water park, and making friends with its manager. Not only is the cast stacked from top to bottom, but Faxon and Rash's writing is just as poignant as it was in 2011's "The Descendants". Liam James, as the film's protagonist, Duncan, is delightfully fresh take on the nerdy outsider character. Watching him gain his confidence through interaction with his new co-workers has a natural feel to it that should resonate with anyone who ever had trouble fitting in.
The Moment I Feel in Love: Sam Rockwell opens his mouth, and, every time, golden nuggets of awesome drop out.
11. I Declare War
Canadian filmmakers Jason Lapeyre and Robert Wilson created the imagination of a group of adolescent boys (and one girl) with pure ecstasy. "I Declare War" is so well crafted that, at points, it is hard to remember that these are kids, and they aren't actually shooting each other. It also becomes a stark allegory for the effect of violence in society, and the desensitization of modern children. The boys may not have been the finest child actors I saw on screen this year (See: "Mud"), but they are enjoying the roles, and hitting every twist and turn with uninhibited glee.
The Moment I Fell in Love: A young boy is shot in the opening five minutes, and has to count to ten steamboats before he can get up.
10. Nebraska
Alexander Payne has ended up in my favorite films just about every year he has made one. This year he created a bittersweet film about a trusting elderly man who thinks he won one million dollars from a sweepstakes add. Along with his son, he travels to Lincoln, Nebraska to claim his winnings. The movie is filled with the usual Payne characters, his quirky writing, and his wonderful framing of the characters' surroundings. Bruce Dern plays the lead, Woody Grant, with a quiet sadness, and Will Forte, as his son, David, is at his rare best, playing equal parts devoted son and voice of reason. This is a true gem.
Moment I Fell in Love: A family trip to the cemetery turns into a hilarious family history lesson.
9. 12 Years a Slave
Steve McQueen has created the single most frightening film of 2013, and this was a year filled with excellent horror films. "12 Years a Slave" is the true story of Solomon Northup, a free man from the state of New York, who is kidnapped and sold into slavery in the days before the war. Leading man, Chiwetel Ejiofor, plays Northup with a strong resilience, and a cool sophistication in the face of his adversity. McQueen doesn't hold back from the horror, but doesn't push it so far that it becomes meaningless and hokey. At the heart of the film are a cast of characters slowly being stripped of their humanity, whether they are slaves or their owners. This may be the most honest, and brutal, depiction of slavery on the big screen, and should be shown in history classes from now on.
Moment I Fell in Love: You don't really "fall in love" with this film. You endure it. I will say that the first real impact the film had on me was watching a woman get ripped from her children at auction.
8. American Hustle
David O. Russell's "Silver Linings Playbook" unfortunately didn't make my 20 last year, so I was happy when I was so taken by his newest film. This is one of the funniest, snappiest, and most well made pictures of the year. Anybody who said differently must have walked into the wrong theatre. Russell and Eric Warren Singer's script is so fluid, and so outrageous, I couldn't imagine anyone not sitting quietly trying to catch every syllable. I also can't stop thinking about the top-notch performances from this amazing ensemble. Everybody just seemed to click so perfectly into their roles (Jennifer Lawrence, especially). This may be my new favorite David O. Russell film, and that is saying something.
Moment I Fell in Love: Christian Bale's Irving adjusts his "hairstyle" in the opening scene.
7. Mud
Matthew McConaughey has been on a role since "The Lincoln Lawyer", and Jeff Nichols has taken full advantage of that in this film. Casting him as fugitive hiding from bounty hunters on an island in Arkansas was a brilliant play. However, as good as he has been, he gets out-shined by his two young co-stars, Tye Sheridan and Jacob Lofland, who find him, and help him evade the men looking for him, while he searches for his lost love. The deeper the boys get into Mud's backstory, the more present the danger seems to get, until it reaches its violent conclusion. The writing is Oscar-worthy, and there isn't a bad performance in the film. If you missed this Summer gem, you should go back and watch it.
The Moment I Fell in Love: When the boys began talking to each other, their natural patter made you believe they have known each other for years.
6. Inside Llewyn Davis
The Coen Brothers have created another masterpiece. This is a beautiful, dark, and funny film that focuses on a struggling, homeless folk singer during a couple of rough days in early 1961. He is a true talent, in the right place, at the right time, but he can't catch a break because of his inability to connect with other people. Oscar Issac plays Llewyn with a soulful hurt, and a cosmic loneliness that almost alienates him from the audience, and endears him at the same time. The ensemble weaves in and out of the story, giving the nomadic journey, and the Coens' script, a vibrancy that makes the film pop off screen. This has currently made its way into my favorite Coen Brothers films, and THAT is saying something.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Davis goes through his morning with a cover of "Fare Thee Well (Dink's Song)", by him and his late partner, playing underneath.
5. The World's End
Leave it to Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg to make a recovering drug addict, and his former friends, the heroes of a story about an alien invasion. Upon returning to their home town to recreate an unfinished pub crawl, Gary King (played brilliantly by Simon Pegg), along with his four high school friends, discover that the residents have been replaced by mindless automaton look-alikes. Nick Frost, Paddy Considine, and Martin Freeman are a riot as King's buddies, never missing a beat, and displaying an expert level of comedic chemistry. However, it is the fifth wheel, Peter (Eddie Marsan), who gives "The World's End" its deep heart, with his tag-along, sad sack performance. This movie is funny, emotional, and action packed. A blend that almost solely belongs to Edgar Wright.
The Moment I Fell in Love: A mad cap review of a wild night ends up in a rehab group.
4. Captain Phillips
I did not expect this movie to be the heart-wrenching, pulse-pounding movie that it turned out to be, and boy am I happy I was wrong. I went to this thinking, Tom Hanks is usually worth a watch (even in crap like "Larry Crowne"), and Paul Greengrass hasn't done anything I hate (though "Green Zone" wasn't great), so I'll watch it. Instead I got a survival tale, based off of a true story, that was every bit as thrilling as it was entertaining. From Phillips' drive to port, to his capture, to his emotional rescue, there wasn't a second of this movie I didn't love, but it was Hanks' reaction to his rescuers that sold me. I was also introduced to Barkhad Abdi, who played the desperate and tortured Muse, the leader of Phillips' Somali captors. He may stand as my personal front runner for Best Supporting Actor at this year's Oscars.
The Moment I Fell In Love: It is rare that I fall in love with a film in the last 10 minutes, but Hanks' complete emotional breakdown after being rescued captured my heart (Not sure if the pun was intended).
3. Short Term 12
I watched half of this film with tears in my eyes. Writer and director Destin Cretton has created, from his own original short film, a marvelous tale about abuse, isolation, and acceptance. He follows a staff member of a foster care facility who is trying to manage her own troubled life while also trying to keep a group of wayward teenagers in line. The script is achingly simple, but filled with complex characters who hurt and love with heart breaking realism. Brie Larson gives a star-making performance as Grace, and possibly the finest performance of any actress this year, and she probably won't be recognized by any of the major awards this year.
The Moment I Fell in Love: John Gallagher Jr. tells an amusing story about the time he pooped his pants.
2. Gravity
It is hard to explain exactly how great Alfonso Cuaron's "Gravity" is. It is entertaining, and supremely terrifying. It is a great survival film, and a wonderful piece of art. It elegant and visceral. Sandra Bullock plays a medical engineer who gets caught in a field of debris that leaves her stranded in space. Alone. I'm usually not a fan of her's, but under the direction of someone like Cuaron, she carries the film easily. Her panic and fear infects every frame, and keeps the viewer feeling uneasy. Coupled with the dazzling use of 3D (one of the few times I have ever said that) it almost feels like you are right beside her.
The Moment I Fell in Love: The slow push across empty space, while we listen Hank William Jr.'s "Angels Are Hard to Find".
1. Fruitvale Station
There was no film as utterly heart breaking or devastating as "Fruitvale Station" released in 2013. Ryan Coogler's relives the last 24 hours of a young Oakland man who was shot and killed by the police in the early hours of New Year's Day. His star, Michael B. Jordan, is likable to the point that you dread the eventual ending (which he showed actual footage of to start the movie). I liked Jordan on "Friday Night Lights", and in last year's "Chronicle", but I didn't enjoy any performance from this year the way I enjoyed his. He is natural and comfortable as Oscar. Which made his death in the film even harder to process, as I sat in the theater slack-jawed and wide-eyed. Octavia Spencer, playing Oscar's mother, may be in line for another Oscar nod. The reaction she has to his death is the single most moving scene I saw this year. I was not prepared for this film, and it made a lasting impression on me. I hope it will see some benefit for its raw and honest portrayal.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Coogler's decision to show actual cell phone footage of Oscar Grant's murder is bold and instantly jarring.
This was such a great year for cinema that I felt I need to share the eleven films that just barely made it onto the list:
30. Gimme the Loot
29. Monsters University
28. Starbuck (remade later this year as "Delivery Man")
27. Ain't Them Bodies Saints
26. The Broken Circle Breakdown
25. The History of Future Folk
24. Philomena
23. Dallas Buyers Club
22. The Book Thief
21. (a) About Time
21. (b) The Tower (I really struggled not putting these two on the list.)
 |
| GET ON WITH IT!!! |
20. Elysium
"District 9" blew me away with its beautiful special effects, and its allegory of South American apartheid. Though "Elysium", Neill Blomkamp's newest offering, didn't explode off of the screen as vividly, it certainly captured my imagination. Matt Damon plays an ex-con-turned-factory-worker who gets radiation poisoning while on the job. However, due to his social status, he does not have access to decent health care, and thus is given 20 days to live. What follows is a taut science fiction thriller about the dangers of the ever widening class separation, and need for more accessible health care for the poor.
The Moment I Fell in Love: MATT DAMON!!!
19. Side Effects
Steven Soderbergh had quite a year this year. Before he released his Emmy-winning "Behind the Candelabra", he released this twisty thriller starring Rooney Mara as woman who kills her husband, while on an experimental prescription medication, and the therapist caught in her web (Jude Law). Soderbergh tends to get the best out of all of his actors, and his cinematography (as "Peter Andrews") is as low key and relaxed as ever. He captures Scott Z. Burns' twisting narrative with such minimal effort, that it is impossible not to find yourself swept up in every minute detail and betrayal. Unfortunately, this came out in February, so there will be no Oscar buzz, but Rooney Mara should be put on the list for Best Actress consideration, because she handles every word without a hitch.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Channing Tatum gets stabbed and killed. What's not to love?
18. Her
There is so much depth, and so much heart, to Spike Jonze's latest film, "Her". It is charming and funny, while introspective and emotional. Joaquin Phoenix plays Theodore, an introvert who is going through a messy divorce, and is having trouble connecting to the outside world (despite his job writing "hand-written" letters to other people). He downloads a sentient new operating system, Samantha (voiced to perfection by Scarlett Johansson), and begins to fall in love with her. Well written, beautifully shot (thank you, Hoyte Van Hoytema), and expertly acted, this look at intimacy in an ever-changing world is the perfect romance film for the modern age.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Theodore and Samantha do a little duet.
17. The Wolf of Wall Street
Martin Scorsese has created the quintessential film about excess. Casting his now decade long partner, Leonardo DiCaprio, as real life stock broker Jordan Belfort, he managed to make a film that is loud, sleek, and packed wall to wall with unbelievable debauchery. It is also a very scathing criticism of the lavish lifestyles of men who are essentially highly paid thieves and swindlers. Terrence Winter's script is funny and shocking, while Rodrigo Prieto's cinematography is smooth and stylish. The cast clicks in all the right ways, and gives a SAG worthy performance. Be warned, however, this movie is NOT for everyone.
Moment I Fell in Love: Belfort, during his first job on Wall Street, goes to lunch with established broker, Mark Hanna (played by Matthew McConaughey).
16. You're Next
It isn't often that horror movies make it in to my top films of the year. Last time might have even been "28 Days Later" in 2003. "You're Next" just happened to have such a basic premise with absolutely stunning execution. Director Simon Wingard does everything in this home-invasion film that James DeMonaco failed to do with "The Purge" earlier in the year. It's tense, frightening, and, at times, really funny. The third act of this film may be some of the most interesting bit of horror cinema I have seen in quite some time. This became one of the least talked about films of the year, and that seemed very undeserved. You should take the time to take in this soon-to-be cult classic.
The Moment I Fell in Love: A twist in the plot leads to some seriously amusing consequences.
15. All is Lost
There is a reason that Robert Redford is movie star. There is a reason that Paul Newman worked with him so often. There is a reason he was cast in a film where his character is the only face you see on screen and barely speaks, and it is one of the most riveting performances you will see all year! Writer/director J.C. Chandor has you spend 106 minutes watching one man fight to save himself after his boat hits a random shipping container floating in the middle of nowhere. Despite the action only revolving around a single person, the story never seems to drag. Every setback is heartbreaking, and every victory almost feels like you should audibly cheering.
The Moment I Feel in Love: It is hard to pinpoint, because I was so immersed in Redford's character (plainly named "Our Man").
14. Frances Ha
Greta Gerwig may be the most utterly charming actress in Hollywood today. For proof, you don't need to look any further than her performance in Noah Baumbach's "Frances Ha". This is the story of young dancer who is a bit of slacker, and more than a little homeless. Baumbach, from a script co-written by Gerwig, creates a stunning homage to French new-wave cinema, and directs possibly the best Woody Allen film to not be made by Woody Allen.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Watching Frances gracefully dance, though she clumsily fumbles through life.
13. Before Midnight
If you ever wanted a more realistic take on how relationships actually work, then look no further. Richard Linklater, Julie Delpy, and Ethan Hawke have given you the third installment to their series that started in 1995, and it is absolutely the best of the three. After spending one night together in Paris, and finding each other ten years later, Celine (Delpy) and Jesse (Hawke) have settled down, and built a life together with their twin girls, and Jesse's son, Hank, who sees them only twice a year, which actually becomes a major point of contention for the two. Much like the previous films, this is a dialogue centered piece about the nature of love, and the hardships of relationships.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Jesse's awkward goodbye to his son is both funny and touching.
12. The Way, Way Back
Oscar-winning film makers Nat Faxon and Jim Rash co-wrote and directed this coming-of-age film about an awkward 14 year old boy on vacation at his mother's boyfriend's summer home. He ends up getting a job at a water park, and making friends with its manager. Not only is the cast stacked from top to bottom, but Faxon and Rash's writing is just as poignant as it was in 2011's "The Descendants". Liam James, as the film's protagonist, Duncan, is delightfully fresh take on the nerdy outsider character. Watching him gain his confidence through interaction with his new co-workers has a natural feel to it that should resonate with anyone who ever had trouble fitting in.
The Moment I Feel in Love: Sam Rockwell opens his mouth, and, every time, golden nuggets of awesome drop out.
11. I Declare War
Canadian filmmakers Jason Lapeyre and Robert Wilson created the imagination of a group of adolescent boys (and one girl) with pure ecstasy. "I Declare War" is so well crafted that, at points, it is hard to remember that these are kids, and they aren't actually shooting each other. It also becomes a stark allegory for the effect of violence in society, and the desensitization of modern children. The boys may not have been the finest child actors I saw on screen this year (See: "Mud"), but they are enjoying the roles, and hitting every twist and turn with uninhibited glee.
The Moment I Fell in Love: A young boy is shot in the opening five minutes, and has to count to ten steamboats before he can get up.
10. Nebraska
Alexander Payne has ended up in my favorite films just about every year he has made one. This year he created a bittersweet film about a trusting elderly man who thinks he won one million dollars from a sweepstakes add. Along with his son, he travels to Lincoln, Nebraska to claim his winnings. The movie is filled with the usual Payne characters, his quirky writing, and his wonderful framing of the characters' surroundings. Bruce Dern plays the lead, Woody Grant, with a quiet sadness, and Will Forte, as his son, David, is at his rare best, playing equal parts devoted son and voice of reason. This is a true gem.
Moment I Fell in Love: A family trip to the cemetery turns into a hilarious family history lesson.
9. 12 Years a Slave
Steve McQueen has created the single most frightening film of 2013, and this was a year filled with excellent horror films. "12 Years a Slave" is the true story of Solomon Northup, a free man from the state of New York, who is kidnapped and sold into slavery in the days before the war. Leading man, Chiwetel Ejiofor, plays Northup with a strong resilience, and a cool sophistication in the face of his adversity. McQueen doesn't hold back from the horror, but doesn't push it so far that it becomes meaningless and hokey. At the heart of the film are a cast of characters slowly being stripped of their humanity, whether they are slaves or their owners. This may be the most honest, and brutal, depiction of slavery on the big screen, and should be shown in history classes from now on.
Moment I Fell in Love: You don't really "fall in love" with this film. You endure it. I will say that the first real impact the film had on me was watching a woman get ripped from her children at auction.
8. American Hustle
David O. Russell's "Silver Linings Playbook" unfortunately didn't make my 20 last year, so I was happy when I was so taken by his newest film. This is one of the funniest, snappiest, and most well made pictures of the year. Anybody who said differently must have walked into the wrong theatre. Russell and Eric Warren Singer's script is so fluid, and so outrageous, I couldn't imagine anyone not sitting quietly trying to catch every syllable. I also can't stop thinking about the top-notch performances from this amazing ensemble. Everybody just seemed to click so perfectly into their roles (Jennifer Lawrence, especially). This may be my new favorite David O. Russell film, and that is saying something.
Moment I Fell in Love: Christian Bale's Irving adjusts his "hairstyle" in the opening scene.
7. Mud
Matthew McConaughey has been on a role since "The Lincoln Lawyer", and Jeff Nichols has taken full advantage of that in this film. Casting him as fugitive hiding from bounty hunters on an island in Arkansas was a brilliant play. However, as good as he has been, he gets out-shined by his two young co-stars, Tye Sheridan and Jacob Lofland, who find him, and help him evade the men looking for him, while he searches for his lost love. The deeper the boys get into Mud's backstory, the more present the danger seems to get, until it reaches its violent conclusion. The writing is Oscar-worthy, and there isn't a bad performance in the film. If you missed this Summer gem, you should go back and watch it.
The Moment I Fell in Love: When the boys began talking to each other, their natural patter made you believe they have known each other for years.
6. Inside Llewyn Davis
The Coen Brothers have created another masterpiece. This is a beautiful, dark, and funny film that focuses on a struggling, homeless folk singer during a couple of rough days in early 1961. He is a true talent, in the right place, at the right time, but he can't catch a break because of his inability to connect with other people. Oscar Issac plays Llewyn with a soulful hurt, and a cosmic loneliness that almost alienates him from the audience, and endears him at the same time. The ensemble weaves in and out of the story, giving the nomadic journey, and the Coens' script, a vibrancy that makes the film pop off screen. This has currently made its way into my favorite Coen Brothers films, and THAT is saying something.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Davis goes through his morning with a cover of "Fare Thee Well (Dink's Song)", by him and his late partner, playing underneath.
5. The World's End
Leave it to Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg to make a recovering drug addict, and his former friends, the heroes of a story about an alien invasion. Upon returning to their home town to recreate an unfinished pub crawl, Gary King (played brilliantly by Simon Pegg), along with his four high school friends, discover that the residents have been replaced by mindless automaton look-alikes. Nick Frost, Paddy Considine, and Martin Freeman are a riot as King's buddies, never missing a beat, and displaying an expert level of comedic chemistry. However, it is the fifth wheel, Peter (Eddie Marsan), who gives "The World's End" its deep heart, with his tag-along, sad sack performance. This movie is funny, emotional, and action packed. A blend that almost solely belongs to Edgar Wright.
The Moment I Fell in Love: A mad cap review of a wild night ends up in a rehab group.
4. Captain Phillips
I did not expect this movie to be the heart-wrenching, pulse-pounding movie that it turned out to be, and boy am I happy I was wrong. I went to this thinking, Tom Hanks is usually worth a watch (even in crap like "Larry Crowne"), and Paul Greengrass hasn't done anything I hate (though "Green Zone" wasn't great), so I'll watch it. Instead I got a survival tale, based off of a true story, that was every bit as thrilling as it was entertaining. From Phillips' drive to port, to his capture, to his emotional rescue, there wasn't a second of this movie I didn't love, but it was Hanks' reaction to his rescuers that sold me. I was also introduced to Barkhad Abdi, who played the desperate and tortured Muse, the leader of Phillips' Somali captors. He may stand as my personal front runner for Best Supporting Actor at this year's Oscars.
The Moment I Fell In Love: It is rare that I fall in love with a film in the last 10 minutes, but Hanks' complete emotional breakdown after being rescued captured my heart (Not sure if the pun was intended).
3. Short Term 12
I watched half of this film with tears in my eyes. Writer and director Destin Cretton has created, from his own original short film, a marvelous tale about abuse, isolation, and acceptance. He follows a staff member of a foster care facility who is trying to manage her own troubled life while also trying to keep a group of wayward teenagers in line. The script is achingly simple, but filled with complex characters who hurt and love with heart breaking realism. Brie Larson gives a star-making performance as Grace, and possibly the finest performance of any actress this year, and she probably won't be recognized by any of the major awards this year.
The Moment I Fell in Love: John Gallagher Jr. tells an amusing story about the time he pooped his pants.
2. Gravity
It is hard to explain exactly how great Alfonso Cuaron's "Gravity" is. It is entertaining, and supremely terrifying. It is a great survival film, and a wonderful piece of art. It elegant and visceral. Sandra Bullock plays a medical engineer who gets caught in a field of debris that leaves her stranded in space. Alone. I'm usually not a fan of her's, but under the direction of someone like Cuaron, she carries the film easily. Her panic and fear infects every frame, and keeps the viewer feeling uneasy. Coupled with the dazzling use of 3D (one of the few times I have ever said that) it almost feels like you are right beside her.
The Moment I Fell in Love: The slow push across empty space, while we listen Hank William Jr.'s "Angels Are Hard to Find".
1. Fruitvale Station
There was no film as utterly heart breaking or devastating as "Fruitvale Station" released in 2013. Ryan Coogler's relives the last 24 hours of a young Oakland man who was shot and killed by the police in the early hours of New Year's Day. His star, Michael B. Jordan, is likable to the point that you dread the eventual ending (which he showed actual footage of to start the movie). I liked Jordan on "Friday Night Lights", and in last year's "Chronicle", but I didn't enjoy any performance from this year the way I enjoyed his. He is natural and comfortable as Oscar. Which made his death in the film even harder to process, as I sat in the theater slack-jawed and wide-eyed. Octavia Spencer, playing Oscar's mother, may be in line for another Oscar nod. The reaction she has to his death is the single most moving scene I saw this year. I was not prepared for this film, and it made a lasting impression on me. I hope it will see some benefit for its raw and honest portrayal.
The Moment I Fell in Love: Coogler's decision to show actual cell phone footage of Oscar Grant's murder is bold and instantly jarring.
Friday, January 10, 2014
The Legend of Hercules (2014)
 |
| Greeking Out |
Grade: F
3D: Not worth the extra money
Easter Egg: I left before the credits started.
Starring: Kellan Lutz, Gaia Weiss, Scott Adkins
Director: Renny Harlin
Writer(s): Daniel Giat, Renny Harlin, Sean Hood, Giulio Steve
RT: 98 min
Rating: PG-13 for sequences of intense combat action and violence, and for some sensuality
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